This week we bought a pair of new toilets — complete with instructions in Chinglish. In the end, it was easier to try to assemble the toilets through trial and error, rather than by deciphering the instructions. (I was also thankful that we have three toilets in the house when we discovered that it would take longer than a couple hours to install the new toilets — something we only worked out after we had removed two of them!)

The new-beaut toilet seat came with a beautiful sticker warning us of improper use:

Chinglish, June 2009
We bought a new butt plate (with a soft-close mechanism).

A new pair of David’s jeans also came with comprehensive washing instructions:

  1. Maching washing:Use wash and wash and wear cycle wash with warm watau.using soap ormild detergent heavey stains may ceouire pre-soaking or pre-speiling
  2. Rand washing:wash to warm water.uasing soap of celid betergent DO NOT WRINKLE OR TWIST.
  3. DO NOT STARCH OR USE BLEADH
  4. Dry in tumble dryer at warm setaug Remove immediately atend or dring shape and hang to drop dry remove from water before fastspin cycle Shape and hang
  5. If touch.up is required.iron at inderate of synthetic heat seiong.