17 February 13
So much of conscious parenting is maintaining a higher energy level than that of our children. It’s outlasting the child’s bad mood or tantrum without letting it affect our own level of righteousness so that we continue to respond in a godly manner.
It’s tempting to want to stop a child from tantruming, from screaming, from declaring that they hate the world and all that is wrong with it. However, I feel that venting is healthy, and so all I can do is offer myself and my love to our children when they feel angry with the world.
I don’t want to set limits on my love and affection. I don’t want to push my child away because I am distressed by her behaviour. Instead, I want to embrace her in love and fill her up when she is emotionally empty of good things.
Instead of trying to shush my child, I remind myself that the noise does not have to be distressing, and I do not need to make her calm down. She will calm down when she is calm, and if I can remain peaceful, I’ll lend her my own aura of calmness to help speed the process.
It’s hard to separate myself from my children’s negative emotions. It’s difficult to not let her stress me. But if I can — when I do — then I am in a much better position to raise her to a higher level sooner.
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but a harsh word stirs up anger.
The more I can outlast our girls, the better an example I offer. This year, I’m intent on outlasting each tantrum, outlasting each bad mood, outlasting the anger and the fighting so that we return to a peaceful household sooner.