Taking sides
31 August 10
After fourteen years of being together, David and I are becoming different people. Gently, softly — God is transforming our minds, and we have decided to express the inward changes by experimenting in making a radical outward change.
We’ve swapped sides.
Yes, the sacred marriage bed has been upset.
I’ve always lain on the right of David (I’m David’s right hand, if you will), and David usually ended up closest to the ensuite (how did that happen?).
How does a couple choose sides anyway? I can’t remember how we did it.
Did David and I sit down and formally discuss the merits of each side, agreeing to compromise with me on the left and him on the right? I think we just fit together properly in a certain way — my left hand holding his right, and the comfortable fit flowed naturally into the bedroom.
But now we’re ready for a shake-up. We’re going to see if it changes our relationship dynamics, and it will certainly cause some confusion for our daughters!
In preparation for the bedtime changes, I’ve switched the bedside table drawers (those are contents that are difficult to sort through!) and have accessorised our individual tables in the particular styles to which we are accustomed — torches, Bibles and a drink-bottle for David’s side, and an mp3-player for my side.
We’re going to try this deliberate change on for size and see if it fits the new “us”. Will it last? Only time will tell!
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1 · Allison · 31 August 2010, 21:18
They say that couples often subsubconsciously pick sides by who is most dominating in the relationship. So whoever naturally sleeps in the “driver” position is the more dominant one. As though your bed is a car, the right side would be the driver. Do you think this is true in your relationship?
2 · Lauren · 31 August 2010, 21:32
Wow, Allison! That’s really deep!
Based on that theory, I’ve always been driving, and now I’m giving the driving seat up to David. (Except, really, anyone who knows us knows that David is the dominant partner… unless I’m subconsciously still on African roads, where I’ve been the passenger all along…)
3 · Mizasiwa · 31 August 2010, 22:17
ja unfortunatly the fact that some of us drive on different sides of the road may make that point moot but its interesting. This sounds like such fun, please let us know how it goes!!
4 · Keith Ellenberger · 1 September 2010, 09:07
Wow! Radical, Lauren! Krista and I have actually tried sleeping together on the opposite side we usually sleep on, but changed back not long after. It just didn’t “feel” right. Perhaps we should have kept on a little longer. However, our goal was much less lofty . . . grand . . . life changing, than yours. Hope it works! Praying for you all.
5 · Aunty Gwenda · 1 September 2010, 21:10
So.. Given this theory, where does the fact that Stewart and I have had separate bedrooms for the whole 12 years of our relationship fit?? We are very happily married and yes he is the driver,(see that surprised you! Gotta watch the quiet ones,) but I am the neck that turns the head. I always walk on his left too. Holding his left hand with my right. Interesting.
6 · Allison · 2 September 2010, 21:34
Ha ha yea I’ve alway wondered that about our relationship too. Am I sleepig on the Australian passenger side, or the American drivers side. I guess that the theory goes for whichever country you are living in or HAVE lived in for an extended length of time. Always interesting to think about though. I wonder if u giving up the drivers seat is significant at all!? Or maybe u r on African roads and u r taking the reigns?! :)